it's not impractical or impossible or whatever you said to log everyday, but we are impractical and illogical beings...... so yeah. haha.
I don't know what's been going on with my diet/weight. Haven't been doing it i guess. i want to lose weight but i'm so preoccupied with other things right now i like don't have time to really make an effort to lose weight. i suppose it'd be easy to just not eat at all and then i would lose weight, but my penchant for wasting time induces me to consuming food, and even if that wasn't the case I would eventually get hungry or need to eat so as to not die. erhm. yeah. i suppose i could try, prioritize my diet. in other areas of my life, namely school, i've accepted my failures, so i don't feel as shit anymore about coming up short and failing cos i've accepted that i'm a failure. like it's not stressful when you don't care so much. but i must remember to not let that affect the work I actually produce. the work i actually produce should be done properly. i've just accepted the time i have and spend not doing my work, and will try to no longer bring myself down about it.
anyway.. i have to go downtown in the morning for a lecture event thing. and also need to get a few things for my personal living while i'm there.
I will try and lose weight. i basically can only allow myself to live a half-life while i'm not satisfied with my weight so i suppose i should care more to lose weight. ah... how it has so greatly shaped the person i am today. i came across that watch you gave me, the flower one from Korea. when I was ten, i had a pair of jean shorts with a butterfly patch on it. i remember wearing that with a white t-shirt that had very tiny flowers entrelaced with a vine. given the colors were earthy. but still. haha. i had no problem with that whatsoever. i guess I would've been more girly if I never got fat. so in a way, I'm glad I gained 8 lbs in four months and thought I was horrendously overweight at 108 lbs. at the start of high school. i may have turned out to be a worse person had I not.
